Dear GHG

Is it worth it? Back yard, summer 2016.

Dear GHG,

I have a problem. I'm always falling for the wrong plants. Oriental lilies, phlox, heucheras - everything that deer and rabbits love, I love too. I've tried Liquid Fence, I Must Garden, Wireless Deer Fence, cayenne pepper, Schmoogie's hair, rabbit netting, wire cloches, and a fishing line fence, and still my heart gets broken. The garden smells like rotten eggs and the plants look like they are in jail. My friends and family think I'm nuts and my shrink gave me a copy of Oh Grow Up Already: How to Stop Lusting After Lilies and Learn to Love the Boring, Dependable Plants That Bambi Would Never Look Twice At.  

I know it's messed up but I can't seem to stop.  What do you think? Am I wrong to hold out for what I truly want? Should I settle for spirea?
 
Signed,

Wretched in Raleigh

Someone's on his way to the barber.

What have you done with my hair?

Really, dear, it's for your own good.

This Won't Hurt a Bit.

Dear Wretched,

Imprisoning your garden in chicken wire and fishing line is perfectly normal behavior and a small price to pay for having an Asiatic Lily like Pearl Jennifer actually bloom, even with a few bites taken out. ​

Fire your shrink. With the money you save, you could have a real fence installed. That fishing line fence of yours is joke and there are buds on Pearl Jennifer. 

Signed,

GHG

Asiatic Lily "Pearl Jennifer." Very tasty.

Free me from my chains. My garden, summer 2016.